I dunno why is it that u never get to experience something in its purest form. Why everything has to be tinged with a certain not so favourable occurance or emotion to make u realize the imperfection of the thing u felt so nice about. Creativity for example.
Creativity is somehow cursed with an undeniable tag of ego to it. Sometimes I wonder why creativity is not free flowing … selfless, constructive, free of the need of appreciation , of praise, of possessiveness, of control … why is it so impatient, intolerant, impulsive.
Why is it that an artist needs to ‘hear’ it that a certain piece of art is good …or let us look at it in the very root … why is there a need to show it to smbdy else in the first place? Why isn’t the artform enuf in itself to provide him with all the solace in this world? Howmuchever our civilized modesty fool us into believing in the opposite , the truth remains that there is an urgent need to putforth, to tell, to show and ‘MAKE SURE’ it is seen by people who can appreciate it and ‘IT COULD COME TO U’ (this is always the subconscious effort)
And unfortunately, it doesn’t stop at this … creativity is intolerant … it detests interference … until u r madly in - 1. love or 2.awe of the person interfering. It wants everything to be its own – very own …the more others contribute, the more the joy is diluted … and it is possessive as well …. Somehow somebody else touching ur piece of art always causes an impulse of pain.
Creativity is selfish … It wants to give, but always with a tag of ‘me’ in it … ‘I’ suggested /worked hard/implemented/made sure/designed this. … ‘I’ made it better than it was … maybe I make it sound worse than it is, but that’s because I am worse than the others J
Once hridaynath mangeshkar was complemented by sanjeev abhyankar .. (plz do not take this lack of prefix adjectives like pandit to be my arrogance … its just that I am completely unaware of their hierarchy) . The latter complementing the former that his music was divine … and the former replied , “I mite be a good artist, but definitely not divine … I wouldn’t be here singing in front of u in that case… I would have relinquished ths and retired to the Himalayas … its my NEED to sing in front of u … “
Sometimes I think may be ‘uthal panyala khalkhalat far’ fits here perfectly. I guess its some kind of an insecurity that u feel … ur doubts about ur own creativity that creates the need of external approval … of being constantly reminded/assured of being creative … perhaps if u r ‘absolutely’ creative … nw ppl can argue on this and to be honest I ‘absolutely’ clueless about ‘absolute creativity’ … but then may be if u r either gifted enuf to have it or lucky enuf to develop it … u could be all that … pure, selfless, free, unaffected , balanced … no longer being tied by somebody else …. Just unadulterated bliss ….
For beginners though, we could start with questions like, “why did I feel the need to publish this blog ?” :)
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8 comments:
Creativity......
A thing which makes people to make other things....
In most of the cases your opinion is right. You have evaluated it up to a very high level, i know, (your last line tells that); but its not the hard and fast rule. let me give just one example...
Why there are a bunch of articles and poems and stories having "Anonymous" at the end???
I think creation brings happiness to the creator, but sometimes the creator still feel incomplete, imperfect about the creation. This is one way to get to perfection.. To keep trying and to keep hoping to get better...
many a times it is also a mode of communication to the world...
It brings him closer to the people with similar set of interests. Most of us doesn't know everything, so when we discuss what we do with other people we also might get to learn or know more about the field.
There is also part of feeling happy about appreciation of our creation, that's a bit natural I guess.
hey...just came across your post...yes...an artist searches for himself in his audience....
but listen to shivkumar sharma or chaurasia when they play....read about shivji's take on performance amongst audience...sometimes an artist just wants to share his magic discovery with people out of benevolence...he dsnt 'need' to, just wants to, as easily as he may not want to... at one stage, an artist reaches the everest of his ability, and he finds out that he is no one, the art itself is everything....
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